Thursday, March 15, 2007

Still Burning the Midnight Crude

You know, the news is just the most depressing litany of bullshit I have seen since the Carter days. I do not even know where to start. I have been wrapped in the private sector for several weeks, covering for a good friend who is probably enduring the worst days of his life. Watching the news between schematics and programs has not been a pleasure, I must say.

[T]he Council of the City of Berkeley endorses the case of Rumsfeld et al. . . .

[T]he Council of the City of Berkeley supports all efforts throughout the world to hold Donald Rumsfeld and other United States officials who have prosecuted the War on Terror in violation of any applicable law to be held both civilly and criminally accountable for their actions before any tribunal with jurisdiction over the matter, whether such legal proceedings are pursued in this country or abroad.

In other words, We the Council of the City of Berkeley declare ourselves treasonous and suicidal mouthpieces for Al Qaida, who bark like cihauwas over Rumsfeld, but let illegal Mexican invaders walk all over our city and state without any regard for the law.

If you are a moonbat, being a treasonous criminal is something to be celebrated and applauded.

Just look at this guy, who stuffed his pants full of evidence and burned it later, along with his recollection.
Oh poo-poo-dee-doo. Clearly we don't know what he destroyed, so it could not have been important, right?

Of course, you had better live up to the letter of the law, if you work for a Republican and are being interrogated for a fictitious non-crime.

Just ask this guy. But why look at Scooter, when there are real, genuine victims of injustice in this world?

For solid evidence, we must seek the sage counsel of the lesbian who looks like Michael Moore, with a shave and breast implants.

She will describe, in brutal detail, all of the horrible injustices suffered by this guy, who's only crime was to single-handedly terrorize western civilization and bring two towers down in the financial mecca of said home and castle. Hey. He really feels sorry about killing all those women and children on 911. Do you not feel the pain of the injustice America has visited upon him, with their horrible interrogations? You know Rosey does.

But fret you not, dear readers. We are, as of right now, bringing Rosey swift justice to the real threats in this world, the Pendleton 8,

who we deftly trained to kill the enemy. Unfortuneately we did not defly train them to fill out paperwork, or engage in professional C.Y.A. like Washington politicians. Thank God those Marines can feel safe sleeping at night, knowing the magic carpet is about to be yanked from under their feet, by the Democrat controlled congress. The president doesn't want to watch, so he is off to central America, where he is obviously loved by all.

Of course, on the big Hollywood international screen, this guy might be toppled by his own:

Or this guy might get a hold of the bomb:

Of course, neither of these is a real threat to the planet.

Just ask these guys:

As surely as Christopher Reeve would be alive today, walking around with a healing lump of embryonic stem cells in his neck, we are about to suffer the total and complete Armageddon of Global Warming.

Hang on to your roller coaster seats, as the planet takes you on the ride of your life, far to the right of the decimal point, in small temperature increments.
As much as Ann Coulter's opinion of Edwards was excoriated in the press, it does look like John has some of that same-sex appeal Ann was talking about.

Just ask the candidate with ears big enough to make a GOP elephant jealous. He thinks Edwards is 'cute'. You go girl!

Mmmm, MSM propaganda merchants are good eatin' ! Hey Darwin! Where the hell are you! We really need your ass down here to clean up the place.


Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Old Heros Must Die, for the Good of the State

Today, an icon will fall from the stars.

That's ok. The captain just did not fit in our multi-cultural, multi-national multi-ethnic world.

We have a new hero, in America. With a wave of his mighty hand, he will right all of the wrongs in our fat, decadent, overindulged society. Soon we will be basking in the glory of the new totalitarianism of free markets, unfettered by free speech and individuality.

All hail General Mao, the new hero of the political left.